Wanting A Tradition

The Fourth of July is Jason's favorite holiday. He loves the cook-outs, the fireworks, the feeling of summer freedom, the noise, the family time... When I asked him tonight why it was his favorite, he listed those things, but then he quickly added "But mostly, I love that 234 years ago, men decided to stand up, and say we aren't going to take anymore." These men sacrificed their lives, their families, and their fortunes so you and I could celebrate this day with a smile on our faces and the freedoms that we have come to take for granted. I agree with him whole heartedly. Each year on this special day, I'm almost overwhelmed with pride for this great country that we call ours. However, I feel as if something has been missing over the past several years. I miss a 4th of July tradition that our children can call their own.

Growing up, we spent most of our Independence Days in the Black Hills of South Dakota. My parents' home town of Lead, SD became a little bit of my own through my youth. Each year, they closed down Main St. where we walked all day long--from my grandma's house to the park, and then back again. We were left alone to spend the money that we had brought from home on the crafts that the vendors sold on the street and only went back to Grandma's for the sloppy joes that were kept warm in the crock pot. I remember the freedom of those days, the joy of walking down the street of small town America feeling that all was right in the world. Later that evening we gathered as a family, both immediate and extended, on blankets and lawn chairs, to watch the fireworks that forever represent the holiday. I can still remember going to bed on those nights feeling full of life and liberty. Feeling like this is what the Fourth of July was all about.

I want that for my children; yet, I don't feel like we have found our tradition. Like last year, we will head to our friend's lake house tomorrow morning. We will celebrate the 4th of July in the sun and water, fun boat rides and games, a cookout and a low country boil. Tomorrow night we will gather together as a family at the water's edge to ooo and ahhh over the fireworks that are let off at the marina. I will be happy and full of American pride. That, I do not doubt. However, I still don't feel like it's completely ours. Our friend has his own extended family who we do not know. He invites friends who we have not met. I won't be completely comfortable because I will worry that my kids are a nuisance or be occupied with concern on whether my dogs are an inconvenience to anyone. Please do not mistake this for complaining. I more than appreciate our friend's hospitality and his willingness to open his house to our Seabolt clan. I am thankful for the time that I get to spend with Jason and our children. I just can't tell if it's the tradition that I'm longing for...

I'm sure I have glorified my days of youth. Don't we all. It's a time that has passed. Years of innocence that shined--something as adults we yearn for. After writing this, I realize that my kids will not feel any of my uneasiness of the day. They will be content to have their parents there to play in the sun, their siblings there to laugh with, and strangers who become their friends in one day. So, maybe this isn't a tradition as of yet. Maybe next year we'll find something else to do to commemorate our country's independence or maybe we'll be back at the lake house. I think I've discovered through my own words that we don't necessarily need a distinct happening for this holiday. What I can do to establish a tradition in this family is to make sure it's just that--our family. Together. Smiling. Laughing. Appreciating. Although I would give anything to have my kids walk those same streets of Lead that I walked many years ago, I realize those streets were for my time. They no longer exist--the celebration happens only in the park, and some woman who no longer plants my grandma's flowers occupies that house on Julius St. That time has passed. Now is the time for my children, and if I work it just right, as adults they, too, will glorify the Fourth of July holidays of their youth.