A year ago

One year ago today was my due date for our third child. My only daughter was due on November 19th, and as we all know, she didn't go by that plan. She arrived almost a week later. At this time last year, I thought I was never going to make it, but a year later, I realize she was more than worth the wait. She's such a completion to our family. We just feel right. It's funny because when we go out to eat, we are often stared at-especially by those whose children are grown. Here is this family of 5 with three little ones six and under. I don't know if they are glad they aren't in our shoes or fondly remembering their days when they were there. I like to think the latter. My family of five makes me smile, and again, the wait was worth it.

I can't believe a year has gone by. I still remember those nights when she woke me, and I stumbled to her room barely awake. I would sit and feed her and relish in the peacefulness of my home. It was just me and my girl, and those middle of the night feedings weren't so bad. I remember her first smiling at us, and her little body sitting up for the first time. I remember hearing "DaDa" and "MaMa" come from her sweet lips within a day of each other. I remember her wanting to crawl and me encouraging her to stay put. I remember those first teeth coming in and the delight in the belly laughs she offered and still does. I remember looking up while in the kitchen realizing that my 10 month old girl was about to start walking. Now I just look at her and can't believe that our 8lbs 13oz baby turned into a 24+lb toddler. I feel like I blinked on accident, and it happened too quickly.

I'm having a harder time with this child turning 1. When your plan is that she's your last, you try to hold on just a little longer. I am taking time to enjoy her stages more realizing that soon I won't have a baby to cuddle in my arms. Remembering that before I know it, she, too, will be climbing the stairs on that big yellow bus. She has reminded me that I need to treasure each step in a child's life. I try to take a snap shot of Landon, Noah, and Lilah individually more often. Putting a stamp in my head of Landon as he begins to read more and more each day. Mark a spot of Noah recognizing his letters and proudly saying "I see my name" when he sees the letter N. Putting an asterisk next to it as he corrects himself with "That's what my name starts with. It's an N". Placing a memory of Lilah trying to figure out a new obstacle and succeeding. Just taking time to remember the little things because they are gone before you know it.

Yes, she was worth the wait, but not just for her alone. She was worth it because her birth opened my eyes and reminded me that it all goes too fast.

Loving my three kids now, one year ago, and many years to come....